Title: Submission in Marriage

Proposition: As Children of light we must be submissive in marriage

Text: Eph 5:21-33

Intro:
	1.  Story of newlyweds and “that’s one”
	2.  Without a pattern in any area of life, when there is more than one person, will be trouble
	3.  God has a pattern for marriage:  Eph. 5:21-33
	4.  Context - Submission to one another, a mark of the spirit filled life
	5.  Prop:  The text explains this submission in marriage:

I.  Wives are commanded to be subject to their husbands:
	-Subject means to rank under, idea of a chain of command
	-Principle of men as leaders, in the church - but that is a different discussion, here
		we are talking specifically of the marriage relationship

	A.  By realizing God ordained it (I Cor. 11:3)
		1.  Not because we think it works, but it is God’s plan
		2.  the Bible has shown that God’s way is always the best way in the end
		3.  God’s plan in the garden
			a.  Adam was created first
			b.  The first time God said it is NOT good - was when man was alone
			c.  Eve was made from man
			d.  Eve was to be a “helper” (not a slave)
			
	B. By realizing submission to the husband is submission to the Lord (I Pet. 3:1-6)
		1.  Eph 5:21 - “as to the Lord”
		2.  Example in I Peter of submission
			a.  Submissive even to unbelieveing husbands (gentle & quiet - true beauty)
			b.  Women of old - made selves beautiful by submission - Sarah said sir
			c.  Notice context (I Pet 2:23 - Jesus did not revile), 3:1 “In the same way...”
		3.  Solomon wrote that a nagging wife is a constant dripping
		4.  A wife is to fear/respect her husband (v.33)

	C.  By realizing that submission to the husband is to be in ALL THINGS
		1.  Most will cringe at Paul’s instruction here.  What if husband makes unreasonable
		     demands.  What if he commands her to do something illegal?
			a.  Paul includes “in all things” 
			b.  Peter did not, he was talking about unbelieving husbands
			c.  RULEOF THUMB:  Obedient in all things unless it is a violation of God’s 
			      will - not if you disagree, not whether you like it or not...
		2.  Remember Jesus was submissive to the father to the point of death
			a.  They did not recognize him nor honor him as they should have
			b.  A husband not loving his wife does NOT RELEASE A WIFE FROM HER
			     DUTY TO GOD AND HER HUSBAND
		3.  Unssubmissive wife will have problems
			a.  Problem with God (because problem in submission to husband is 
				problem of submission to God
			b.  Problem with her husband - ceases to be his completer & becomes
				a crippler instead.  He cannot fulfill his duty to God as leader
			c.  Problem with children - They will follow example of rebellion, and be
				rebellious to her mother if she is feircly independent, stubborn and
				rebellious to her husband
	D.  ILL:  Christian hindu woman with unbelieving husband in India.  He eventually was 
		converted


II.  Husbands are to love their wives
	- Whay say this, isn’t it natural
	-Background, danger of abuse of man’s authority
		-Jewish women like property/ Greek women - no public place/ Roman Women
		-DIVORCE RAMPANT AND EASY IN 1st century
			-majority of surviving documents in Greek
		-Seneca wrote that women were married to be divorce and divorced to be married
			-Accounts of women with 10 husbands
			-One who had 8 in 5 years
			-Jereome said in Rome was a woman 23rdf husband and she was his 21st

	As Christ loved the church

		1.  Selfless Love 
			a.  He gave himself up for her - a sacrificial concern
				1) We became his body
				2) She becomes our body
					- Gave up individuality when married
					- Make decisions with her in mind & her welfare
			b.  Difference in Christian leadership & worldly (Luke 22:24-27)
			c.  This is not a right to be taken by women, but a duty to be performed

		2.  Sancifying/ Beautifying Love
			a.  Cleansing by the laver of water
			b.  sanctify, (to dedicate)  set on a pedestal
			c.  No spot (defilement ) or wrinkle
				- Difference - wife make self beautiful, but church was made beautiful
				  be Christ
				- Is their a difference:  NO, Love can make a wife beautiful
					- Adorned in I Pet 3 by submission
					- Love makes it easier to be submissive
			d.  ILL:  Illustration of abusive husband and his “list”.  Died, remarried, found
				 list in attic years later.  Laughed, doing all of the same things, but
				  out of love.

		3.  Self Love
			a.  As you love your own body
				- Nourish and Cherish it (cherish - “comfort” originally meant to warm)
			b.  Leave father and mother and “cleave” (tanakh - “cling” to his wife)
				- They become one flesh
				- Strongest tie is now to wife, not parents
			c.  ILL:  David’s wife Michael and her duty to new husband, protected him 
			     from her father Saul


Concl:	1.  Wives submit to husbands and husbands love wives (v. 33)
	2.  Home will vbe a confusing place without it
	3.  Home with it will raise happy and adjusted children
	4.  Assess self, Wives have you been submitting to your husband quietly?
	5.  Husbands have you been loving and cherishing your wife?