Title: Submission at home

Proposition: As Children of light we must be submissive at home

Text: Eph 6:1-4

	1.  Do you remember when you were learning to drive with your parents?
	2.  What if you said “I don’t want to do what you say or follow the sings, etc.”?  Not ready to drive,
	     because not respect parent, the law, the car, etc.
	3.  Lack of respect a paramount problem in today’s society.
	4.  Nation is boiling itself to death with contemporary parenting philosophy like the Frog in the Kettle
	6.  Text:  (Eph 6:1-4)  setting and context
	PROP:  Parents and Children Need to Value each other in Spirit filled families  IQ: HOW  IQ:

 CHILDREN:	-The word for children used here is “teknon”, meaning children, offspring or descendant
		-It is NOT the word teknion, which means little children
		-Thus this is not limited to “little” children, but all children


	A.  Obedience from “hupakouo”
		1.  Word developed from two words, hupo (under), and akouo (I listen to, or I hear)
		2.  Thus the idea is to “listen under”
		3.  (Col. 3:20)  - “Children be obedient to your parents in all things, for this is well pleasing to the Lord.”

	B.  Reasons for children to Obey parents
		1.  Note the words “in the Lord”
			a.  This formula is uses in 5:22 AND 6:5
			b.  NCV reads “Obey your parents as the Lord wants”
			c.  It is the Lord’s intention, the oldest human institution is FAMILY
		2.  “For this is right”
			a.  Did not say - because Parents are better, perfect, smarter, know everything, 
			b.  We may think we know more than parents, but that does not mean not to obey
			c.  WHY is it RIGHT?  --  Because GOD says it is
		  3.  Notice what the passage does NOT SAY	
			a.  Obey them only if the rules are not stupid
			b.  Obey them only if you feel they are being fair
		  4.  Notice he DID SAY to be obedient to your parents in ALL THINGS (Col. 3:20)

	C. ILL:  Child comes home w/friend. Parent -”Go and clean the garage NOW!”  Friend -”How did you
		keep from yelling at your Mom?  I would never let my Mom speak to me that way.  Child - “I 
		had it coming.  I told her I would clean the garage and didn’t.

	D.  That is obedience, “listening under” to your parents


	A.  Honor:  Definition
		1.  Greek:
			a. Verb Timao - honor, value, revere, compensate
			b. Noun Time - Price, value, respect
			c. Adj. - Valuable, precious, honorable
		2.  Hebrew:  Honor, Glory, Wealth, rich
		3.  Thus the idea of honor means to VALUE your Parents
		4.  ILL:  It was Mark Twain who said at 14 he thought his parents were the dumbest people
		in the world, but by the time he was 21, he was amazed at what they had learned in 7 years.

	B.  Reason to Honor parents, (because it is right) and because of the two-fold promise
		1.  That it may be well with you
			a.  From Dt. 5:16 in the 10 commandments
			b.  How is honor going to give you wellness?
				1) Will learn to honor and value others (“give honor to whom honor is due”)
				2) Honor wife, employer, kids, etc.
		2.  That you may live long on the earth
			a.  Ex. 20:12 & Dt. 5:16 (Dt. adds that it may go well with you) - Originally says that
			      your days may be prolonged in the land
			b.  Does not just mean that kids get stoned if rebellious, living long...
			c.  Progression, not obey, problems in life and family, passed to next generation
			d.  “You cannot change your ancestors, but you can do something about your 

	C.  Honor parents.  ILL:  Kevin and his messy room.  Mother- You never clean your room, I’ts a PIG 
	             STY!   I ought to charge you $300 a month!  What? for this pig sty?

	D.  Ways to honor your parents.
		1)  Respect their God given role as parents	2)  Try to see life from their persepctive
		3)  Ask for their advice				4)  Show appreciation
		5)  Pray for them				6)  Tell them you love them
		7)  For for them in their old age (II Tim 5:8 - He who does not provide for his own family has 
		     denied the faith and is worse than an infidel)

  FATHERS	-Why is this addressed to just Fathers:  1) They are the leaders
					               2) While nurture is natural for mothers, it’s not in us

	-First of all, let me say that anyone can do this if they have a willing heart, a relentless spirit, 
	and the desire to see your children run the race for God.  ANYONE CAN DO IT, the single 	
	father, single mother, the poverty stricken couple in the slums, the CEO, anyone can get
	the job done.

	A.  “Bring them up” - extrepho - “Rear, bring up, nourish, cherish, feed” (also used in 5:29)

	B.  Contrast provoke v.s. nurture
		1.  Alternate Translations
			JB - “And Parents, never drive your children to resentment”
			NEB - “You Fathers, again must not goad your children to resentment”
			NIV - “Fathers, do not exasperate your children”
		2.  (Col. 3:21) - “Fathers, do not exasperate your children that they may not lose heart”
			a)  Mixing up Praise and Encouragment
			b)  Too high expectations
			c)  Put downs (excessive use of negative reinforcement)
			d)  Comparison with someone else
			e)  Not respecting their feelings (listen to them and acknowledge)
				- “A winner listens, a loser just waits for his turn to talk”
		4.  Things that will nurture/build up (feed) a child
			a)  Give them responsibility (something they can feel good about)
			b)  Communicate that they are special just because of who they are
			c)  Respect them for who they are (they are children)

	C.  ILL:  Dad who used to read to me every night before bed, lifted weights, played ball, etc.

	D.  30 ways to say I love you (See attch.)  LOVE IS NOT LOVE IF NOT EXPRESSED


	A.  Discipline and Intrsuction are synonymns for each other

	B.  Definition
		1.  Discipline (is not punishment)
			a.  Heb. 12:11 - “All dscipline for the moment seems not to be joyful but sorrowful; 
				yet to those who have been trained by it, afterwards it yields the peaceful 
				fruit of righteousness”
			b.  2 Tim. 3:16 - “All scripture is inspired by God & profitable for teaching, 
				for reproof, for correction, for training in righteouness.”
			c.  Prov. 13:24 - “He who spares his rod hates his son, but he who loves him 
				disciplines him diligently”
			d.  Prov. 23:12-14
				1) The goal of discipline is to correct, the goal of punishment is to punish
				2) It is teaching a valuable reality lesson
				3)  It is a proof of love and of sonship
			f.  Extremes in Discipline which ruins its effectiveness
				1) No discipline (say’s I dont love you, I don’t care)
				2)  Beating (says I dont love you)  SOME WERE OFFENDED AT spanking
				      session ar Family Seminar?  Why? Need to know proper way of doing it
			g.  Discipline is not limited to spankind
		2.  Instruction - idea of teaching, warning, admonition
			a.  Does not say exactly how, but it does say do it
			b.  Article from Christian Chronicle
			d.  In order to be an effective Nurturer, Discipline, Trainer, etc.
				1) Have to model these things
				2) Integrity is the key, children have built in baloney detectors
				3) Integrity means integrating (do you admit your faults as well as your kids
	C.  ILL:  Mrs. William Morris $55 dollars traffic fine for 18 yr old son, smaked him on the head, 
		magistrate was shocked first, then grinned, reducing the fine by $10.  She said, “Oh that’s 
		nothing, wait till I get him home”
		-   Let me say this, the most important thing about nurturing instruction is communicating 
		     love, if you do that, children overlook your shortcomings and faults
	D.  Plan for being a good Instructor (or Faith Trainer)


1.  Therefore, children and Parents need to Value each other

2.  Summary
	a.  For Children	-	Obedience
	b.  Parents -		Nurture

3.  Summons
	a.  Children, How have you been honoring your parents?
	b.  Parents, How have you been lovingly nurturing your children?
	c.  Here is how I will do it__________________________

4.  Stimulation:  Story - “The Ice Cream Girl” 

5.  Invitation