Sermon: How to deal with hate and bitterness
Summary: The psalms model how to deal with hate and bitterness. It is not through acting it out, nor is it pretending that there is no bitterness when in fact there may be great bitterness. Instead, the Psalms model us taking it to the Lord in all honesty in our prayers and allowing God to search our hearts and try them, bringing peace and godliness.
Text: Psalm 137
Scripture: Ps 26:2-7
Intro: 1. Have you ever gone through a tragedy and felt disconnected in worship? a. Maybe lost a loved one to a drunk driver b. Maybe marriage broke up due to an abusive relationship c. Maybe someone slandered you and got you fired from job d. You do you best to drag yourself to worship - The sermon is about joy, and rejoicing in the Lord - You feel disconnected, you don't have strength to rejoice - You feel more like weeping, screaming, or just numb 2. The Psalms give us language for the dark nights of our lives a. Song #701 in song book, taken from 137th Psalm b. Can you feel the sadness, despondency, broken heart of this song? c. Sometimes songs of sadness are more in order than joy in our lives 3. But song#107 stops short of using the entire Psalm. Let's read Ps 137 a. Notice there are two beatitudes in this Psalm - Oh the blessedness of the one who repays you - Oh the blessedness of the one who dashes your little ones against the rock - We usually not think of these as beatitudes b. Why the Psalmist expressing this? - Background - Enemy attacked and destroyed home, it is just a memory - Killed family, friends, grandparents, neighbors, etc. - Now, they want entertainment from captives, a song of Zion - Can you imagine the bitterness, the hate c. But this is not an isolated occurrence in the Psalms - There are many "imprecatory" Psalms that have invoke judgment, calamity, or curses on the enemy - Many Psalms are like this: 5, 6, 11, 12, 35, 37, 40, 52, 54, 56, 58, 69, 79, 83, 109, 137, 139, 143 - Example: Ps 109:6-20 d. We don't read them 4. Why do we tend to ignore these types of Psalms? a. They make us feel uncomfortable b. They are not godly ways of dealing with things 5. There are ways to deal with enemies, hate, and bitterness. Three options
I. RetaliateA. This is the world's method of dealing with enemies - Revenge 1. Often makes for a good story or movie 2. People cheer on the guy who one by one searches out and retaliates against the enemies who wronged him 3. This Psalm seems to affirm this How blessed is the one who repays, takes revenge B. However, the Bible is very clear about this 1. Jesus was very clear about this a. (Mt 5:38-42) - Turn the other cheek b. (Mt 8:43-45) - Love your enemies and pray for them - Does not mean pray curses on them - If we love enemies, we will not pray curses on them 2. (1 Jn 3:15) - If hate brother, you are a murderer with no life a. But he is my enemy, not my brother b. Still makes you a murderer of your enemy c. Supposed to love your enemy 3. (Rom 12:19-21) a. Bible says never take your own revenge b. Overcome evil with good c. No overcome enemy by doing to them when they do to us C. ILL: Dorthy Sayers says 1. When we demand justice, it always justice for us against others 2. We never ask for justice against ourselves for all we did wrong 3. Reason is we want revenge, not justice 4. When justice is done to us, we cry out that God is vindictive D. So as Christians, we don't retaliate to get revenge 1. Bible is clear we are not to do this 2. Instead, we are to pray for enemies, overcome by doing good 3. But it doesn't always work - what if we can't bring ourselves to really forgive?
II. PretendA. Since we are not supposed to feel this way, we pretend we don't B. But what do you do with Psalms such as this? 1. Perform what some have called a "psalmectomy" a. We removed those Psalms from our devotional life b. We don't quote them c. We don't really deal with them d. We are not supposed to feel that way, much less say it 2. What happens when we do these psalmectomies? a. We pretend we don't have bitterness b. We try valiantly to go on as if everything is alright c. We never truly deal with the bitterness 3. Is this ideal? a. Mt 5:8 - Blessed are the pure in heart, they shall see God - I don't feel close to God any more, he is so distant - My bitterness has come between us - Can pretend, but it is still there b. Rom 12:9 - Let love be without hypocrisy - In other words, let it be genuine, not fake - God never wants what is fake c. Lk 6:41-42 - Why look at speck in bothers, eye when log in yours? - Can't see clearly to help with speck - Need to get rid of log of bitterness d. This is not the ideal 4. Besides, how long can you keep it up? (Heb 12:14-15) a. Avoid root of bitterness that springs up b. If left unattended, the sprout with grow and spread C. ILL: Like the tree growing by the fence 1. At first it was barely even noticeable, then it grew 2. The bigger it becomes, the more noticeable, harder to deal with 3. Pretty soon it will take over that portion of fence, destroy it 4. Best thing to do, uproot it when it is little D. Same way with the bitterness in our lives 1. Don't hide it, it will grow and take over your life 2. Heb 12 says by it many will be defiled 3. So how do you deal with it?
III. Be Honest with GodA. Don't try to hide it from God or ignore it 1. Instead, express it all to God 2. Tell God how you feel B. Why should you do this? 1. It is modeled in scripture a. This Psalm not just a random rant, but is scripture - All scripture is inspired of God - It is profitable for training in righteousness - These types of psalms have their place b. Imprecatory sentiment exists in the New Testament too - Gal 1:9 - If preach different Gospel, be anathema - 2 Tim 4:14 - Alexander the coppersmith did me much evil: Lord reward him according to his works - Rev 6:10 And they cried with a loud voice, saying, How long, O Lord, holy and true, dost thou not judge & avenge our blood on them on the earth? 2. It is honest a. The Psalmist says he just can't sing - How can we sing the Song of the Lord here? - The song in my heart has fallen silent - Joy has turned to bitter mourning b. The Psalmist expresses his bitterness - He doesn't hold back, he lays it all out there to God - God already knew it was there - Articulating it, the Psalmist can see it more clearly 3. Honesty allows God to help you deal with it a. You can't deal with what you refuse to acknowledge b. (Rom 8:26) - We don't know how to pray as we ought - We don't know what we should ask for - All we can do is express our bitterness - Spirit intercedes for us in our "attempt" to pray 4. It is an expression of faith a. Expressing bitterness to God is not a lack of faith b. It shows you know the best place to go with that ugliness - Only place you can find strength is God - Only one you can find peace through is God c. Walter Brueggemann suggest the only way genuine forgiveness is possible is only when there has been a genuine articulation of hatred - Being honest refuses to minimize the wrong done - Being honest maximizes the level of forgiveness - Being honest does not leave any loose ends d. (Ps 139:19-24) - Psalmist expresses his heart to God - Then he asks God to examine his heart - There is such a thing as righteous indignation - There is also such a thing as unhealthy bitter hate - Psalmist brings it all to God in prayer to inspect C. ILL: It is like a festering wound, or a sickness 1. When body is sick, what happen when pretend it not there? a. A wound will fester, infection, gangrene, and spread b. It is like that bitter root that spreads 2. I remember meeting brother Smithers in Arkansas a. He was dying of cancer b. Family had suspicions, but he was in denial c. Eventually, the cancer spread all over d. Family was grieving and upset he didn't go to doctor sooner 3. When you are sick, you see a doctor for healing 4. The same is true for a sickness of the heart, or of the spirit a. No place to go other than the Great Physician b. Only he can purify your conscience and your mind c. Only he can cleanse your heart d. Only he can help you find peace in Him D. Do not try to hide your heart from God 1. If hide what God already sees the bitterness may not go away 2. Be honest in your prayer to God
Concl: 1. If you feel disconnected due to bitterness, and it wont go away a. Don't just keep to self and pretend b. Don't bring it to everyone else - Unless it is to confess, get a godly ear, direction, support . . . - But if it is to spread misery around and complain, don't do it c. Bring it to the Lord - Let him have it all - He can take it, after all, he bore sins of the world - May take time, but best place is to bring it to God 2. Bible says Jesus is our merciful and faithful high priest a. He is one who can sympathize, he has been human as well b. Bring it all to him (inv) c. He can cleanse your heart of the darkness and bring the light back
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Sermon: How to deal with hate and bitterness
Summary: The psalms model how to deal with hate and bitterness. It is not through acting it out, nor is it pretending that there is no bitterness when in fact there may be great bitterness. Instead, the Psalms model us taking it to the Lord in all honesty in our prayers and allowing God to search our hearts and try them, bringing peace and godliness.
Intro: Ps 137, Ways of dealing with hate and bitterness
I. RetaliateA. World's method of dealing with enemies - Revenge B. However, Bible says different 1. Mt 5:38-42 - Turn the other cheek 2. Mt 8:43-45 - Love your enemies and pray for them 3. Rom 12:19-21 - Overcome evil with good
II. PretendA. Some perform a "psalmectomy" Then have to pretend they are okay B. Is this ideal? 1. Mt 5:8 - Blessed are the pure in heart 2. Rom 12:9 - Let love be without hypocrisy 3. Lk 6:41-42 - Why look at the speck C. Can you keep it up? Heb 12:14-15
III. Be Honest with GodA. Why should you do this? 1. It is modeled in scripture Gal 1:9; 2 Tim 4:14; Rev 6:10 2. It is honest 3. Allows God to help you, Rom 8:26 4. An expression of faith, Ps 139:19-24 B. Best place to take it is to God
Concl: 1. Bring it to the Lord 2. Bible says Jesus is our merciful and faithful high priest 3. He can cleanse your heart
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Summary: The psalms model how to deal with hate and bitterness. It is not through acting it out, nor is it pretending that there is no bitterness when in fact there may be great bitterness. Instead, the Psalms model us taking it to the Lord in all honesty in our prayers and allowing God to search our hearts and try them, bringing peace and godliness.
Open: (choose one) - What is your favorite movie that has payback or revenge in it? - What have you ever had stolen or taken from you that hurt you?
Explore (Ps 137)
1. Discuss the historical events that form the background to this Psalm. Where is Israel? Why? What happened to their home? How were their captors treating them?
2. Describe the various kinds of mourning we see in this Psalm. What do the "beatitudes" say about the Psalmist?
3. How should this psalm be understood in light of Ps 139:19-24?
4. How should this psalm be understood in light of Rom 12:17-20?
5. How should this psalm be understood in light of Rev 19:1-6?
Apply:
6. Does this make you uncomfortable at all? Why?
7. How can you know the difference between godly indignation and ungodly indignation? How does scripture guide you in this?
8. How might this Psalm and the other verses in this study help you in your prayer life?
9. Have you or are you dealing with a situation that may require you to forgive? How do these verses help you in this?
Prayer:
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